Saturday, November 5, 2011

3rd Class Citizen: Life of An American Half Breed

Born to a Caucasian father and a Filipino mother, There I stand. Born on a Naval base in Agana Heights Guam, then living the first 9 years in the Philippines, I found myself in Tampa Florida. A world where the accents were strange and the pigmentation was not the norm to my slanted eyes. This is where I first learned that I was a chink,gook,slant eyed slope. This is where I first learned that I was Chinese,Japanese, look at these dirty knees. What was I? My birth certificate had me as Asian Pacific Islander, yet some forms that I had to fill out had me listed as Asian and I also saw a few that had me listed as White. Was that an assumption based on dealing with my father without my presence. At that point it didn't matter. What I did know is I was made to feel not wanted and that I didn't belong. My first day of school has always been a vivid scene stuck on replay in my head. I remember leaving school wearing a yellow E.T. shirt when I was walking down the dirt road that was a direct shot to my house from the school. What should have been a 5 minute walk turned into a 15 minute fight against 5 guys who jumped me, both for being the new guy and by the racial name calling, for being what I was. It wasn't until my brother who looks more on the caucasian side stopped to see the commotion realized it was me under the pile that it as broken up. And when the kids asked why he stopped them from beating up the chink kid; it was then I realized that I was different and they looked at the two of us different from each other. Not realizing we were related until he said so.  So as much as I tried through  the years to fit in, the years past with more ridicule and verbal abuse along with built up anger. My boiling point came when I was around 15 years old when I guy almost hit me in his car. He stopped and said "You stupid gook I bet you don't even speak American" I replied "No I speak English" then I picked up a loose brick from the cobblestone road and bashed his car window. I felt good and bad at the same time. Good in the sense that I stood up for myself but bad because I felt a monster coming out of me. As the years past I gained my click of friends who accepted me for who I was and I became less restless about this inner emotion I had about racial issues. So at 17 years old I joined the United States Army, where I thought it would all be behind me, but ever was I wrong. There to the comments arose and the snickers behind my back were made. The difference was I lived a double life. I worked as a 71M Chaplain Assistant as far as the military was concerned, but out of the eyes of the Chaplains, SGT Major, First Sergeant and Commander, I would rip everyone a new one that said anything remotely close to what I would perceive as a sneer towards me. So were does that bring me now as a 37 year old man and father of a 19 year old daughter. To be honest I'm not sure. I have spent allot of time fighting for human rights from ethnicity to freedom of speech to freedom of choice and sexual preference. I spend more time enjoying laughter and making people laugh. I've learned some say it out of ignorance and some say it out of fear, and some out right mean what they say. I cannot fight the world, but I was able to make a change for me and my associates, by both fighting and reasoning. Now I fight with words and I'm proud to be your American Half Breed. Ive fought through the 3rd class citizenship, and made my way to the top of job markets,friendships and a general place in society. Maybe to some I'll always be 3rd class but I'll always be number 1 with the people that count.....      Learn-Respect-Apply-Love

19 comments:

  1. Your conviction is AMAZING! I'm not sure what breed I am... Probably a mutt! That would explain everything!

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  2. Well that story was so disturbing and I hate that it happened. I hate it that you were hurt too. There are no excuses for that.

    I hope your life is better now. I really do. I am glad you are able to be so honest.

    Hey do you know you have a white line running through your background and Helpful Hannah here - the background makes it a little hard to read.

    I hope you don't mind me telling you. I just really like to read what you have to say. Don't change it - just wanted you to know.

    Sincerely Sandie you're newest follower.
    sandie

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  3. I guess that from my standpoint, everyone I meet is a people too, until they prove otherwise. This came from being a Navy brat and having lived in so many places before I was an adult. Thank you for checking out my blog, I'm glad I found yours. ;D

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  4. Thanks Jamie Brook Thompson. Theres n othing wrong with being a mutt. truthfuly we all are. And Chatty Crone thanks for reading, Life is much more grand these dsys I assure you. And WillyBCool yeah I was a AirForce Brat before I joined the Army and as hard as it was to move and make friends over and over again, I always tried to give bennifet of doubt to people.. Thanks to all for reading

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  5. Thanks for leaving your comment Gordan, because I've found your blog.

    I hate racism in any shape or form. As you know, I'm nifty with the virtual slaps so let me know if you need me!

    SP

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  6. Ah - so much more readable to me - thank you so much. Look forward to the next post. sandie

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  7. Yes Sandie, I must admit it was a little hard on the eyes, so my sister Michelle from http://thepeacockgal.blogspot.com/ Ramblings of a Peacock tweeked it for me. Being a newbie to this she has been helping me on the layout

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  8. Excluding Native Americans, no one in the US should ever be raising a stink over not being "from here". Almost all of our people are from somewhere else, and well mixed at that!

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  9. I've never really witnessed that much racism, people seem to be more accepting of Asians and other cultures nowadays. Sorry that you had to experience so much of it. Thanks for the follow. Peace! : )

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  10. @ Samantha well said.. Matter of fact very well said. Ive been saying that my whole life. Everyone here are decendants of people who came from a different places and intergrated to this so called melting pot. @ Joseph yeah I have seen a change over the years and that makes me happy to see

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  11. I'm a half breed too. Mexican and Caucasian. I've had my fair share of struggles as a result of the ignorance of some but all is well. I'm glad you realize there are true friends you can always count on. It makes a difference.

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  12. That is true Crystal Pistol true friends are there because they accept you for who you are. Im glad you got through it too

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  13. That it is Ink Spiller.. Thats where it starts

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  14. I think Gordy as we get older too things of that nature do not effect us as greatly as when we are kids...i totally feel you though....on some of my forms i was white...on some i was hispanic...lol.......and my earliest memory of some thing kind of racist was in chicago i could have been no more than 5 riding the train with my dad....he was darker skinned black hair and i was way light skinned kind of blondish hair...i remember someone questioning my dad if i was his daughter. Where we lived in Chicago we all stuck together but there was a definate negative racial vibe agaist Puerto Ricans. Like you now i embrace all my heritage puerto rican/irish/spaniard. We are all Human beings and deserve respect if we give respect. Luv your blog Gordy...take care of you :) Kat

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  15. Thanks Kat.. Miss seeing your dad around. May he R.I.P. and hope all is well your way.

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  16. "Maybe to some I'll always be 3rd class but I'll always be number 1 with the people that count..... " -- Great thought. Mabuhay from our islands! :)

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  17. Oh Thank you for stopping in Isadora. I hope you enjoyed reading it

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